South Middlesex Times

The transition from high school to college can be challenging for both students and their parents, whether the student is moving onto campus or commuting from home. Stephanie Marcello, chief psychologist at Rutgers University Behavioral Health Care, provides insights on how first-year students and their parents can manage the stress associated with this significant life change.

Marcello explains that even though this transition is generally considered a "good change" anticipated with excitement, it still involves a significant shift in daily routines and expectations. "Any big changes, even a positive one, that impacts an individual’s life significantly can cause stress," she notes. Families will have to adapt to new schedules and say goodbye to previous routines, which can be energy-consuming and stressful.

Marcello emphasizes the importance of normalizing these feelings of stress and anxiety. "Stress often has a negative connotation, but when families are going through these types of changes, it is very common," she says. She advises implementing strategies to manage stress effectively rather than avoiding these natural feelings.

To manage stress without negatively affecting relationships, Marcello recommends open communication between parents and children. She advises acknowledging the novelty of the situation for both parties and managing personal anxieties without projecting them onto others. Establishing daily routines focused on sleep, meditation, walking, and intention-setting can also help.

For parents with commuting students, clear conversations about boundaries and household rules are crucial. Marcello suggests listening fully without interruptions during discussions to foster understanding. Recognizing the additional challenges faced by commuting students in making social connections is also important.

Maintaining open lines of communication after college move-in involves establishing mutually agreeable levels of contact. Parents should check in periodically but avoid over-communicating based on assumptions about their child's well-being.

Parents missing their children or previous lifestyles should allow themselves to feel those emotions while prioritizing self-care and connecting with others undergoing similar transitions. Marcello highlights that secure parental attachment positively impacts students' psychological well-being.

Homesickness is common among first-year students, with studies indicating that 70 percent experience symptoms initially. The rate at which homesickness decreases varies among individuals based on personality traits and external factors such as family support back home.

Students combatting homesickness should focus on building new social connections by participating in campus activities and classes. Recreating aspects they miss from home can also help alleviate feelings of homesickness. Parents should support their children's efforts to engage socially rather than encouraging frequent visits home unless necessary due to persistent symptoms affecting daily life.

Marcello concludes by reminding families that navigating this transition perfectly is unrealistic but having compassion for oneself and each other can significantly ease the process.